Fear of Failure. Fear of the Unknown. Fear of Death. Fear of Spiders, Heights, Clowns, etc. Absolutely everyone has some sort of fear. Just by saying this, I know it evokes an imagery in your brain of your worst fear. I could talk about my “fear” of clowns right here (brought on by Stephen King’s IT), but there is something that can and sometimes will be more debilitating than just a fear of a big red nose and gnarly hair. I have a “Wall of Fear”. This “Wall” prevents me from doing numerous activities, projects, etc. I sometimes think that “Wall” prevents me from success.
So…what do I mean by this? Well, it’s like me starting my blog. I have so many ideas in my head that are conjured up by only God himself, but I just can’t drive myself to sit down and pound out another page. I hit the “Wall”. I have a fear of the possibility of this getting big, a fear of it not getting big, a fear of saying something I shouldn’t, a fear of saying something I should, and so on and so forth. The Wall. I’ve quit doing some very important projects just because I have run smack dab into that Wall.
So…what do you do now? If you have ever suffered from depression, you know that even the most anticipated activities in your life become dreaded and more often than not, something you don’t even show up for because…of your depression. If you continue to do this, your life turns into nothing but a hole…a deep, dark hole. So one of the hardest things we have to do with depression is to…just…go. Do it! Make an effort. Sometimes a huge effort is needed, but nonetheless…make that effort! I have literally had to force myself (or my husband has) to get ready to go somewhere with tears (and fears) and physically pull myself to standing to get going.
So…this is what I have to do with the Wall of Fear. Physically, mentally, and yes, spiritually fight through it, over it, or around it…whatever gets me there. Over that wall. The hardest part is starting. The rest gets easier. And sometimes the rest is so enjoyable that you wonder why in the world you allowed something to ever get in your way! Just like the walls of Jericho, the wall will come tumbling down! Thank God! THE WALL will become…the wall. Instead of climbing breathlessly over it, you will be able to just step over it, then you will turn around and see that it truly never was a wall. It was just a stupid stumbling block put there to tear you down one brick at a time.